That standard question that you get asked, especially when they are small little babies: “Is she a good baby?” As opposed to “Naughty”? What is that? Because they are more awake, and demand more of your attention, then the assumption is that she is naughty? And when you are sleep-deprived because of nightly wakings, then you are somehow doing something wrong?
Maybe it is something that goes into default mode. Default mode to parenting styles which was the in-thing when we were growing up. I even made the “mistake”, for the sake of peace in my previous life, to let my first-born cry after she was put down. (The teen has got ONE valid reason already when she blames her parents one day at the psychologist.) I cringe now, but at the time I had to please a jealous husband…
Penn State researcher Douglas Teti “examined the role of emotional availability on infant sleep” by putting in cameras in the bedrooms of babies between one month to 24 months.
- Regardless of a family’s night-time routine: parents who were responsive and warm had fewer night wakings and an easier time drifting off. It makes the child feel safe and secure!
- Scepticism towards sleep training: 1. it does not work! 2. It affects the parent-child relationship itself.
It gets better! Even though we had a bad night last night where Mieka just would not settle (I blame the five o’clock nap she got in the car), she mostly goes to sleep within 20 minutes when she is healthy.
All this too will pass, and we will definitely miss that small little body throwing her legs across us when lying next to us in bed…