Daughter, wishing you only the best on your birthday

Birthday girl

Dearest Daughter

It is such a great journey to have lived with you for 23 years now! I wish you the best on this day and into your future!

I am so proud of you for finally getting that last subject (and getting those marks!), and that you are enjoying your new life as a working adult! (I can't call you The Student anymore, although you have already signed up for an online course...) Although still under "probation" at work, but I am sure it won't be a draw-back! Most probably helping you along the way!

You are the reason I don't get despondent about parenting that much! ;-) I raised you as the perfect example of what we want our kids to become! Self-sufficient, able, happy, life-affirming go-getters in life!
If I did it right once, surely we can do it right this time?
But I do realize it's more about you and the person you are, and not about our parenting successes or failures!

Littler Miss was very excited about your birthday! She could not wait to give you the earrings she made for you from the Kids Emporium breakfast stash. (See photo above) She also insisted to buy you toothpaste, because she does not want to share her toothpaste with us.
That's why you got your present with the toothpaste! (We cannot dream up these things, even if we tried... ;-0)

You are very special to us and Little Miss! She was a bit sad that we can't go with you tonight when you see your friends, but the restaurant outing last night made up for it!

Enjoy your day!
Love you!

10 Things that make me Happy

I was tagged on Instagram by Moipone Islam at ferocioushaven

Here is mine:

10 Things that make me happy!

(Not necessarily in this order)

1. Happy is a choice! I choose Happy!

2. My Eldest. When she’s happy, I am happy! It is so-so-so GREAT that everything is working out this year for her. She is finishing up with her studies, she got a REAL job, she is madly in love and she’s got a car!

3. My Youngest. She makes us happy every day! (Sometimes crazy, but mostly happy!) Just being her! So glad that she is in our lives!

4.  My Husband!  He’s our rock and showing us each day what a good husband, father and provider he is! He is the best chef as well!!

5.  The extended family that cares about us

6. Friends that care

7.  Our dogs (Hubby won’t agree on this one! ;-) )

      8.  Coffee/Red wine (equally happy!)

      9. Books/reading.

      10. Blogging

What makes you happy?

Throwback Thursday - The Student

She got her degree a year ago today!

She got the superhero cape!

Time flies!!

Feeling nostalgic on my Eldest's first day at a real job

She got a job! She's not The Student only, any more! She has a job in the Corporate World and we are very proud!

I had to drop her off today at her workplace. This is a new beginning! 

I am feeling a bit nostalgic today! It is like a first day at school, high school or university. It is a new phase in her life, but also ours! (There's a few tears here! But that's just me!)

This is where we want our children to be! Independent adults who have their own careers!

"We" made it!

"We" successfully helped her to become her own!

I think we do have "license" to say that we have a part in it!

We are very proud of you, my Girl!

My words of wisdom today: Don't be a wise-ass, but listen to what they are going to teach you! (I cringe when I think back to my own first job, and how smart I thought I was! I was a real pain in the bud...)

Take all the experience you can get!

Photo: Junior SEO Copywriter walking away to her first job!

5 Tips to a job seeker

Keep on searching for the perfect job! - Bitstrip

(From the Job Seeker’s Mom)

We have a job seeker in the home. The Student is finishing her final subject in the first half of this year. The initial idea was that she stayed on at University and to get a student job while at it. But the student jobs are few and not paying very much. She is now at home near the city to find a job while completing her final studies on every second Saturday.

A head hunter told me last week that the job market is saturated, and that the employers can be very finicky! We experienced it already! The Student was at University last week to register and she could not go to an interview that she was invited to for the next day. She was immediately disqualified! Although she said that she would be available on Skype or back home this week, it was not acceptable!  That’s how cut-throat it is!

So I thought I would get in a pep-talk for this Monday…

Tips to a Job Seeker

(Translate: Mom’s wisdom on finding a job!)

1. Do not get despondent too soon! 
It feels like it’s taking too long, but a few months is not too long measured against a lifetime of work.
You are not “unemployed”, but a “job seeker”.  (There’s a difference! Yes, there is!)

2. Make sure all your CV and online information are up to date!
Do a regular Google search from another computer (not your own) to ensure that your online profiles are “job-worthy”!

3. Engage your social media networks!
It’s usually through contacts and who you know that get you a job. People love helping people when they are asked to or know how to help!

4. Do not take any job because you are getting frantic.
You have studied to have a specific career, and don’t let go of that goal. The jobs that we do tend to define us, and sometimes it can limit us in our future job seeking efforts!  (Trust me! I know!)

5. You are still a student! 
In today's  workplace you will keep on being a student!  Work that title as much as the title of being a “job seeker”!


Do you have any more tips for a job seeker?

2016 - a few notes on the start of the year!

This is the week that everything goes back to reality!
I have been back at work since last week, so it does not feel as alien, and I don't have the millions of emails to sort through!

Little Miss asked me this morning if school is going to start tomorrow. She was very relieved to hear that she has two whole days left of holidays!

Little Miss in 2016

- She is not as excited about Grade 2 as she was about Grade 1.
- She is also worried about bullies in her class this year. I told her that we would sort them as soon as they start with bullying. We have already asked that she not be placed in the same class as two kids who made her life miserable the previous years. (I hope so, but I trust the school will honour our request!)
- We bought a new school case, but I recycled most of her stationary from the previous years. She was upset at first, because it's "old"! Luckily the complaints stopped when we put everything in a new stationary box for school. You can't see the difference, and we saved a lot of money!
- She is getting big and I love all the conversations we are starting to have. Real existential questions and remarks. I was in awe last night about the depth of her understanding about spirituality!
- I will try to write it down and share it here! (If she allows me!)


MomAgain@40

- This little blog has only a year left before the 40 won't ring true anymore! (Heavens!!)
- Little Miss is also getting bigger, and I am starting to censor more about what is being put here!
- I have a year to decide what I am going to do with this blog, but I think I will re-purpose or start a new blog with a new theme! I still love blogging, the community of bloggers and what I have learnt while blogging!
(There is sooo much I have gained from my experience here!)


Me, Myself and I

Yes

- My word and my motto for this year is Yes! I already had the opportunity to say yes without thinking twice this year because of this!
- I have never regretted saying yes to new opportunities, and this year is going to be better and bolder!
- I still need to work on a Vision Board for 2016. It really works! (Does any one knows about a good Vision Board app? Off to search...)
- On the second of January of this year I became a vegetarian. I have always said that the moment I have to kill for my own food, is the moment I would stop to eat living things! I have been a hypocrite for most of my life! I am taking it day by day, but it is not as difficult to make other choices!
I still eat eggs and dairy which makes me a ovo-lacto vegetarian! (Little Miss tells me that I should stop eating eggs as well! For now I am feeling proud of myself for getting 10 days into the new year without eating any meat!) My family supports me, but it is difficult as we love to braai (barbeque)! My go-to food now for a braai is a mushroom! (Sorry Hubby!!)


The Student

- I feel unsettled about The Student as this is her year to start with a new job and finish the final studies.
- Everything is uncertain, and we don't know yet what is going to happen...


The Hubby

- I am extremely grateful for Hubby who keeps us together and fed!
- I am sorry for upsetting the equilibrium by becoming a vegetarian. (Thank you for taking it in your stride!)
- This year is going to be a better year for you as well! I know it and I feel it!


2016 is starting with new things, new challenges and lots of uncertainty!
BUT I have good feelings about 2016!


May 2016 be good to you as well!
What new things are in the pipeline that is worth sharing?

The Student - THIS is the FINAL year!

We still have a student in the home! The Student needs to complete that final subject for her Business diploma in the first part of the year.

I had to answer the following question this holiday: When do you stop supporting your child?
I suppose it stops when they are able to support themselves?
Or are you strict, and have a cut-off date?

The plan was that she stayed in Potchefstroom to complete the studies, but she was unable to secure a student job. The direct call center job did not pan out in December as we had hoped for.

We are back to the draw-board here in Johannesburg.
She is searching for student jobs, and internships and starting jobs in Communication.
It seems she will be able to start working full-time, because she can attend classes for the outstanding subject on Saturdays.

If anyone of you know about jobs in Communication, PR, HR and Media in Johannesburg, please give us a shout? (She has completed her BA Communications degree in 2014)

I am so sorry I did not buy you the Bratz doll when you were small

To my dear Eldest!

I am so sorry that I did not buy the Bratz doll when you were young!
(You wanted it, because your friends had one!) I don't know what I was thinking, but it's not the same I am thinking right now!

I already bought a Bratz Cloe for Little Miss, and the other day I got a Bratz Jade delivered!  (I was way more excited than Little Miss!)
They are super cute! Why did I think 15 years back they were not pretty?

It's just one of the many parenting mistakes I now know that I have made with the eldest!
There are so many!

I am sorry for everything that I did wrong with you! 

I did it with the best of intentions. (And with the knowledge I had at the time.)

The Littlest is getting to grow up with a lot less of "parenting" I did with you.
(But as we go along we are definitely saying we are doing it wrong now as well.)

Unfortunately we can't do it over!


I heard the surprise in your voice when you reminded me that I did not want to buy you the doll...
I can only say sorry!

She got the sling! It turns out you really need your left arm!

The Student gave us a big fright with the accident two weeks ago!
She was discharged after two days in hospital and recuperated for a week at home.

She is back at university since Sunday, and coping very nicely with one arm.

She has made the following adjustments:

- Buying most of her food. It is very difficult to prepare food and wash dishes afterwards.
- We bought dry shampoo to make her hair last a bit longer.
- We bought pants that she can pull on, without zips and belts.
- We could not find a cover for the arm. She is using a plastic bag with an elastic.
- Friends have to help with washing her clothes.
- She has to ask for help from other students.
- She had to cancel her holiday work that's coming up.
- She has to use a mouse with her laptop since it is very difficult cutting and pasting and adding punctuation.
- She is seeing a campus counselor about the nightmares she gets after the accident! She is very jumpy in the traffic!
-She cannot ride on her newly bought bicycle just yet!


That left arm is sorely missed, but she copes!
I am proud that she takes it in her stride!

What would you miss doing if you were left with only one arm?

A weekend from hell that made us feel very grateful!

The lamp pole in question

We got a call near midnight on Thursday night. The Student was in an accident, and she was still sitting in the car waiting for the ambulance. They were driving on an unknown dark corner of Potch, and there was a turn in the road and the lamp pole jumped in front of them! The car went on it's side before it landed on the wheels again. Unfortunately it was on my daughter's side of the car!

She told us that she knew immediately her arm is broken when she saw it behind her and had to bring it forward...

It was hectic! As a parent you want to jump in the car and race to the scene. But she is a one and half hours away! Luckily we kept talking to her and the friend who was with her in the accident. They kept us in the loop while getting into an ambulance until they were admitted to hospital.

My default mode is going into scold mode before I am able to process it: "What are you doing out so late?" And "Why don't you use the maps on your phone when you know you are prone to get lost?" (She and the friend have lost their way before...)
But if is only for the first few seconds of processing this information...
We were worried and could not sleep!

We got in the car at 6 am on Friday because we thought she would be operated on already at 8 am! Little Miss had to tag along because we did not know if we would be able to fetch her the afternoon. Just as well, because we had to wait until 6 pm for the operation and she only came out of the operating theater after 8 pm on Friday night!

The bones and muscles in the elbow had to be reattached and she has 8 screws and 2 plates in her left elbow!

We could go and fetch her yesterday and she is recuperating at home for the week!

There is so much we are grateful for:

- Except for the arm, both the students are fine! The car is written off!

- The seat belts and airbags saved their lives! There are huge glass pieces sticking into the air bags. They have minimal scratches!

- Medical Aid made everything so much easier. The ambulance took her to a private hospital where she got great care! I did not have to worry about paying exorbitant fees! Everything was covered!

- Student friends allowed us to stay over in their flat for the Friday night! That helped immensely after we left the hospital at ten on Friday night. We stayed until we were sure she was ok.

- Student friends brought her clothes and gifts and visited The Student during the course of the weekend!

- A nice old lady in the same room in hospital who took care of The Student while we could not be around!

- The personnel and staff at Medi-Clinic in Potchefstroom did a great job! Dr Hattingh needs a special mention! It seems he knows what he is doing! He also came to talk to us and her on several occasions and kept us informed. He is also very happy with the operation and believes she will regain the use of her arm!

- It's the left arm that's affected!

- This week The Student also does not have classes and she can stay at home!


Now we have an Iron Woman in our midst!


Do anyone know where we can buy a cover for an arm in plaster?
Apparently Dischem does not stock it anymore and I have phoned one pharmacy at a hospital who also do not have it in stock.

A birthday at Hard Rock Cafe in San Antonio

The Student celebrated her birthday in San Antonio. She knew what she wanted. To have lunch at the Hard Rock Cafe, and to buy herself and a friend Hard Rock Cafe t-shirts.
The Hard Rock Cafe in San Antonio is situated on the River walk.
Each Hard Rock Cafe the world over has their own t-shirts with the name of the city printed on it!
It is a a thing: To collect Hard Rock Cafe t-shirts from all over!

Inside Hard Rock Cafe San Antonio

In the Janis Joplin booth

Little Miss got a whole booklet with colouring pencils to keep her busy

And a kiddies meal in a guitar (guess what she brought home?)

The birthday girl with her drink.
She also got the Hard Rock Cafe glass as a souvenir.

Little Miss was not impress with this birthday celebration. She thinks each birthday should be like the 21st birthday party we celebrated the previous year. We could not convince her otherwise!

Little Hoots

Next time we want to check out the Hard Rock Cafe in Sandton.
(Why have we not been there yet?)

Plot twist

When something goes wrong in your life
just yell
"Plot Twist!"
and move on.

I love this quote!

It is usually not about the wrong turn, but how you approach life after that!

I am writing this for the eldest.

The Student had a big disappointment yesterday. She heard she failed her accounting subject for the semester. She won't be able to do the rewrite, because we won't be here. She has known this since the beginning of the year, that she would have to pass the first time!

She has already started to make plans for next year, but now her plans have to be put on hold for a while...

She will have to get a job here in South Africa to finish the post-graduate! (She had plans to start travelling and working overseas!)

I have first-hand experience that even with the worst plot twists, I could see how it benefited me in the end!

Go with the plot twist, my Love!
I know it will be part of the adventure!

Wordless Wednesday #259 - Superhero poses #graduation

She got the Superhero Cape!

We attended the graduation ceremony of The Student yesterday! She finally got the graduation cape and the hat, and she got her few seconds to shine on the stage!

It was a proud mom-moment, because it feels like we have achieved something as well!

I know I did not do any of the hard work, or worked through the nights, or helped her with any of the studies. (Only a little bit of research some times from my side...)

But we made it possible for her to study. (Cha-ching!! and I am only starting to work back the bursary...) There were times that we said we did not know how we are going to do it, but our focus will be on the completion of the studies. She also knew there was no do-over available! This was it!

And she did it!

I am very proud of her, and so glad that she has something to show for her hard work.
The speaker spoke about the importance of time yesterday: "The importance of a year is so much more appreciated by a student who has to re-do that one year!..."

The wonderful time at university she is having now, is coming to an end at the end of the year. I hope and I know that she is making the best of it! (So glad she is enjoying it!)

It was only the other day I complained about the initiation practices, and in the meantime they have abolished most of it!
We had some pep talks along the way to keep her going, and she also learnt valuable life lessons while studying.

But here we are! She is busy with a post-graduate diploma, and busy thinking about the next stages of life already!

And we are left with the question: "How did it get here so quickly!"

Well done, my girl!
Love you!

More superhero poses can be found here: Wordless Wednesday #259 - Superhero poses #graduation 

Please pay it forward on this Monday and give these students a view

                       Millennium Lady: We made a video about Management in SA



The Student is doing a post-graduate degree in management. For one of their assignments, they had to discuss the three levels of management... (Yes, boring!)


The group with the most views on YouTube can win R10 000 in virtual money for their project due in March. So, please view their video and hopefully you find it a bit entertaining. (Spoiler alert! NO!)


But you will do your good deed for this Monday!

(And a big please from a mother who can't afford another year of varsity! The Student needs to successfully finish this!)

Final year!

The final year for The Student has arrived!

We dropped her off at university yesterday.

It looks like it is going to be a great year! She finally has a single room with more space in the residence. She is doing a post-graduate in management that seems to be very promising... She has made many friends which makes life a ball on campus...

It's the time of her life!

But it is not only a final year for her, but for me as well!
It has been tough on the budget, and I am looking forward to some sort of respite after this year of paying for the studies.

-----

She has been working at attorney's these holidays, which helps with the pocket money. She even learnt a few lessons about how to be an employee from hell! It has been a good experience!


-----

Best wishes for you, my girl!
I hope you enjoy with all your might, because it will pass in a flash!

Catch-22 of a student loan

The Student and I was at the bank this week to try to get a student loan...

What a joke! I could have said "process", but it really feels like baring your underpants, and then after the scrutiny you are left without that same said underpants!

It takes ages for the "process" to complete...
And then you don't have a guarantee they are going to approve the loan.

There were two bank employees going through all our documents, and we still did not have the "right" documents! All the university documents should have a date stamp of 2015, although The Student has a letter of approval for her post-graduate diploma. Apparently we also lacked some more documents from the university, which she would not be able to get at this time in the year...

The bank wants proof of registration from the university! Which we don't have!
(That's what we are trying to get at the bank: Registration fees!)
They will only pay the student loan as soon as the registration is done!

But: The University wants proof of payment of the registration fees!
Or else they wont register her!

A Catch-22!


We gave up on getting a student loan at the bank! It was a very degrading process!
It just does not make sense to try to get a student loan from them.

We have a Student with a Degree!

The Student with a qualification

The Student has written her final exams for her three-year degree. She has heard that she has passed all her subjects!

We are very relieved and very proud!

Congrats to you, my daughter! You have worked very hard!

I can't believe the three years have passed so quickly. (sic! I know! I know!)

Just the other day I was complaining about the initiation practices at university, and here we are! Done! Finished!

-------

She will be doing a post-graduate course next year. And she will finally have that single room in her residence!
Everything looks rosy!

We moved her stuff on Sunday, and brought back some of it for the holidays!

Little Miss brought her "helpers"

Corridors 

Bye to the shared room!

Now, if anybody knows about a student job for the holidays, let us know?

Happy family - update

At the airport

This is the busiest time of the year. I don't know why everybody waits until the end of the year for everything to start happening?

But this is not a post loaded with complaints...

It happens each year, and we are actually going with the "flow". December is not that far away, and there is still lots to be done and accomplished!

I was in Cape Town last week for a conference, which I absolutely loved and learnt so many new things in the world of archives. I also loved being in the centre of Cape Town. It is such an inspiring city against the backdrop of Table Mountain.
(Next time I am definitely going to be born on the slopes of that mountain. In one of those mansions!)

I missed my family very much, and so did they! I realized again how much I enjoy being with them and going on adventures with them. Each of my experiences in Cape Town was loaded with the thoughts of "wishing they were there!"

The eldest did a week of shadowing as part of her practicals for her third year. She enjoyed it so much, and she saw the shadow of her future self emerge! It looks as if everything is coming together with her studies, and she has now decided on her post-degree studies as well! I am so proud of her!
Now it is just getting through the last part of the year with lots of tests, assignments and exams to get through.

The youngest and her Dad bonded very well, and it was good for them to spend some time together.
She is beginning to look forward to Grade One, and we have to count each day until her birthday and until it is Grade One. Dad forgot about the OT appointment last week. Luckily he sent me a picture of his cappuccino, and there was still time for him to go and fetch the Little Miss and take her for her OT.
He told me after the week that he did not get much done than focus on her, and that he don't know how single parents cope...

Luckily we are a family that likes being together!
Happy family!
Happy times!


Keep calm!
Breath deep!
December is a month and a half away!

Women's rights in the month of August

Strong Women #quote on Pinterest

Here's to strong women everywhere for the month of August!

And even though you think you are not strong, believe that you are!



The Student pulled out her soapbox, and I so love that she gets this:

"...the responsibility of the extent of the abuse, does not only lie with the abuser, but with you and how much you will allow until you say: ENOUGH!"

Read here:

Millenium Lady: Women's rights in the month of August





So proud of the strong woman she is!