Ten ways to love your man

Relationship advice

It's September, and it's a great new season to start afresh with relationships.
Hubby and I do not even find the time for date nights anymore...
Checking my calender right away! Even though the budget is tight, we can still make a plan?

I needed to hear this today!
Maybe also you?

Janice Windt from Working Mothers Expo has great advice:

We know what it's really like. When you have young kids, a job to hold down and a house to run, it's not easy to find the time or energy to love your man...

But the truth is that we believe the most important thing you can do for your kids is love your man. And we mean LOVE. We mean look up to him, build him up in your children's eyes and let them see love modeled in your relationship. They will not see it anywhere else. They are more likely to experience the exact opposite in the world, their friends' homes and lives, everywhere really.

         Love is hard to find and hard work to keep... so let's get started.

Ten Ways To Love Your Man
1) Tell him he is awesome...

 Read more: 10 Ways to love your man 



The Working Mothers Expo, in partnership with MiWayLife, brings together everything working mothers need under one roof. It will be from 4-6 November 2016 at the Sandton Convention Centre.
The MCs are Elana Afrika and Claire Mawisa.

The Working Mothers Expo Tickets are available at Computicket now!




Disclaimer: I will be getting tickets to attend The Working Mothers Expo in November.

10 years of happy!

We celebrated our 10 year anniversary on Thursday last week!
It is really genius to have the 1st May as our  anniversary, as it is Worker's Day in South Africa and a public holiday. We are guaranteed a yearly public holiday to celebrate our anniversary as well!

I can't believe that it has been 10 years! It has been so much fun!
"Effortless" is the word that comes to mind!

Although, when we look at our selfies, it definitely looks as if  10 years has passed! (Hubby's food is to blame! Definitely! - That's why there is a shadow selfie!)

Thank you my dear Husband for the person that you are, and the way that you are treating us! The girls and I love you very much, and we appreciate all that you are doing for us!

It really has been a joy to have you in our lives!

We had a lovely breakaway at Glenburn Lodge which is only 30km from Johannesburg. It was especially great that we could fetch the children the second day and that we could spend some time together.

(I will do another post about our stay because most of my photos have already been downloaded on my home computer.)

I just wanted to say thank you to a great partner!
I "know" that it is not always as easy as this! (From a previous nearly forgotten life!)

I am the lucky one!

Short story on the shortest day of the year

There was a young girl who thought that life was going to be smooth sailing after she had finished her studies and drove off in the sunset with her mate.

A fairytale after 50

A friend of mine got married. Nothing new there! Except that she is over 50, and that she got married for the very first time in her life!

I am so glad that I got to know a real life fairytale story. She is a person who enjoys her life, and did everything she wanted to do! And she is still working on her bucket list!

I love the fact that she met the right man, and felt that it was necessary to get married to him. That commitment needs to be sealed with a marriage certificate!

I know over 50 people who are the “breathing dead” already... 

Not Carina! She runs on a regular basis, and you could still find her and her husband walking kilometres on a Saturday for exercise! 

I met her through studies, and we both talked each other in doing our Master degrees.  She completed her Masters two years ago! (I did not!)

We used to meet each other over lunch, each time at a new restaurant to check out the venue and food. It is more difficult now to meet because of work commitments, but hopefully we will still fit in a lunch date here and there... (Hint!)

She loves travelling, and wine. Something she shares now with her new husband!

She is such an inspiration to me! 

Carina and Wynand, may you have a stunning life together!

7 years

It’s been seven years since the day we got married. 1 May has been a very good choice. We’ve got Worker’s Day each year, a public holiday to celebrate our special day!

Thank you, Hubby, it has been a good seven years! It has flown by much too quickly! (Time flies when... Yes, that! Big smile!)

We are having so much fun!

The Teen reminded us that in other countries we get the opportunity to renew our vows. And of course, we all know about the seven-year-itch! Seven seems to be a good number to have reached!

Some fun!

Hubby gave me chocolate and flowers, and I had to make good with breakfast at Second Cup. I nearly forgot because I lost track of the days... I blame the vacation! I thought I still had until Monday!

Related post:
6th Wedding anniversary

6th Wedding Anniversary

6 years with the hubby! It has been a great ride so far! Thank you very much, Hubby, for the great times!


The 1st of May is usually a public holiday here, but this year it falls on a Saturday. We are missing out on an extra off day this year. Bummer...

We spent the day with the toddler. (Yeah, we are sorry excuses!) Nothing gives us more pleasure than being with each other and our littlest! I had to put my foot down (um, I had to write on Dries’s gift card for a DVD) that he could not spend it on a DVD for the toddler... He did just that with a previous gift! (Smile)

I was reminded again today of how very quick special times are going by. My teen chose to spend the day with the boyfriend rather than with us. I totally understand it! (Sigh!) It makes me cherish the time with the toddler even more...

We went for a breakfast at Lifestyle Garden Centre. Nothing beats a breakfast eating out! I am so glad I have a hubby that enjoys going out, even if it is for a breakfast in a restaurant...

We wanted to show Mieka the petting zoo. It is a very child-friendly place for parents to go here in Johannesburg. There is a play area for the children, and a little bit of animals – ponies, geese, rabbits and chickens – to look at. They have pony rides, as well as a train for the children to ride on. Mieka enjoyed the train ride very much, and grabbed the steering wheel in the train coach and wouldn’t let go!

Top photo: The flowers I got from Dries. Aren't they lovely?

Soap box tirades

Emotional abuse is not on! I think it is the worst kind of abuse! Because you can’t show the wounds! I have been stewing now for days with a bad aftertaste in my mouth. It was part of my previous life, and today I go into full battle mode when there is even the slightest breeze of emotional manipulation in the air!
Why do we keep quiet when we are caught up in the game? Do we need to play out the drama until we finally realize that it is not on? Or are we too proud or too ashamed to admit we are not being treated as we should be? I think that has been my reason for putting up with it for so long! Ten years, but ten years has passed since then as well. (Wow! It shows my age.) When I hear of a friend who has been subjected to it as well, I am amazed at how much the modus operandi shows similarities.
Partners that tell you and make you feel crap, AND tell you that you’re thinking are wrong. Partners who do not do their share, but make you feel guilty when you try to hold everything together. Partners who prevent you from being with your friends and family and wants to have 100% of you all of the time…
Enough of the bad stories! I am kicking the soap box back underneath the bed. Powerwoman do not dwell on the past for too long. Everybody has to make their own decisions about how long they want to play in their dramas! Thank goodness for friends and family who help you through the bad times! (I support you too, friend!)
Now my drama is about babies and dogs and teenagers and trying to cope with being a working mother and wife! Peanuts for Powerwoman! (Wink-wink, smile)
I wonder what type of dramas we keep playing that we could have stopped long ago?

Blogging mom2

As a new mom, working, I also feel terribly isolated with regards to connecting to other moms. Most of my friends in the same position are also working full-time and we struggle to get together. That’s another reason for me starting this blog – to understand my own feelings and situation, to connect to other moms and to figure out, while writing, than what I am doing is “right”. If only then “right” for myself and the baby.
Oh, and being the older mom also isolates me… While I am bleary-eyed, lactating, struggling to get back into my pre-pregnancy clothes (a whole other story, and yes, I know, by this time it shouldn’t have been a problem) with a baby on the hip, my other friends are focusing on careers and discussing teenagers and holidays. I am also hiding underneath different caps every day because I am graying (I do not get enough time to colour it), and because I am losing hair post-pregnancy. Luckily its winter and the caps do not look out of place. Also, the winter clothes help to cover the post-pregnancy flab. I am putting on weight and keep on telling myself it’s because I am still breast feeding and can’t focus on drastic weight loss dieting. I was very much impressed with myself for not putting on too much weight during the pregnancy, only 10 kilograms, but it was because I did not have any space left for food. Food also did not have any appeal to me. Unluckily, I got my appetite and “space” back. These topics are not exactly interesting, but that’s where I find myself AGAIN. And I love it all over again: the baby has changed our lives AGAIN.
16 years ago I had a baby, Arnia, and now I wonder how I coped with the baby while being married to a narcissist and manipulative man who most of the time could not keep up a job. The X (the cancelled one) is not part of my life anymore, and Arnia has also started to limit her access to her father. His toxic presence has finally pissed her off completely, and I don’t think the relationship will be mended fully again. It is something Arnia has to work out for herself.
For me it’s a previous life, and it sometimes feel as if I have been reincarnated into this life. Totally different. I am now married to Dries, a wonderful caring, providing and supportive husband. Now I can’t belief that I could have been part of a violent partnership. I realized that by staying there I was enabling him to continue his bad behaviour.
That’s why I belief in new beginnings and new lives. It’s possible and much better the next time around. Maybe I am lucky, but I do believe that we create our own destinies and we are doing it continuously by making choices. My choice is to be happy and peaceful and I am that right now!
Arnia told the X and his wife last night that she is happy and peaceful at our home, and she does not have to stress about anything. It tells us that we (me and Dries) are doing something “right”. We are reconstructed, but we are doing it “better”. And that’s all I wish for! With a beautiful baby girl…

Mom blogging

Blog by Karen du Toit about becoming a parent after the age of 40, the second time after 15 years. It’s all about new beginnings. Being a working mom and married for a second time. Mieka came into our lives the 21st of December 2008. The meaning of her name is “new fountain” in Japanese. Arnia, my daughter of 16 years, keeps on asking me about herself when she was small. And I can't recollect all the small little details. I don't want to forget all the small little incidents that gives us so much pleasure. That's why I want to keep a blog for Mieka for one day...