Parenting before work - I high-fived myself

School drop-off selfie

Yesterday. It was one of those mornings. So many things had to happen, and it had to happen before 6:30 am. We had to be in the car by 6:05 am. Traffic is hectic again! It's February. Hubby did his share and made sure breakfast was ready at 5:55. He even ran after the car with my morning coffee. We were out of the gate at 6:07. Not bad! Thank you so much, Hubby! You are a star!

Grade 4 is a culture shock, but mostly for the Mom

Grade four is a total different ball game here! The children start changing between classes and they start writing tests and exams. The pace is also much faster than the previous grades. Miss Fine has been taking it all in her stride, but we (the parents) feel a little bit overwhelmed.

We have to make sure that we are abreast of her calendar and her homework, A standard request each day is to immediately take out her homework book so that we could check if there is something new. I am writing this down for future reference. We feel like we are doing grade four for the first time, but our grade four, way back when, surely did not involve as much as this? Even 15 years ago with the eldest it was not so tough!

Wordless Wednesday #336 - Working

Wordless Wednesday #319 - Paper doll work mate

Ten ways to love your man

Relationship advice

It's September, and it's a great new season to start afresh with relationships.
Hubby and I do not even find the time for date nights anymore...
Checking my calender right away! Even though the budget is tight, we can still make a plan?

I needed to hear this today!
Maybe also you?

Janice Windt from Working Mothers Expo has great advice:

We know what it's really like. When you have young kids, a job to hold down and a house to run, it's not easy to find the time or energy to love your man...

But the truth is that we believe the most important thing you can do for your kids is love your man. And we mean LOVE. We mean look up to him, build him up in your children's eyes and let them see love modeled in your relationship. They will not see it anywhere else. They are more likely to experience the exact opposite in the world, their friends' homes and lives, everywhere really.

         Love is hard to find and hard work to keep... so let's get started.

Ten Ways To Love Your Man
1) Tell him he is awesome...

 Read more: 10 Ways to love your man 



The Working Mothers Expo, in partnership with MiWayLife, brings together everything working mothers need under one roof. It will be from 4-6 November 2016 at the Sandton Convention Centre.
The MCs are Elana Afrika and Claire Mawisa.

The Working Mothers Expo Tickets are available at Computicket now!




Disclaimer: I will be getting tickets to attend The Working Mothers Expo in November.

How to make every moment count as a working mother - 5 tips

Being a working mother and juggling the rat race of city life are difficult, and I don't think we can have it all!
I am giving myself some grace as I am getting older and "wiser" (sic! Laughing at myself here!)
I try my best to make the moments count, and I do not beat myself up when I "fail"! I try harder the next time!

But there are definitely some ideas to consider to make moments count! Janice Windt, the managing director of The Working Mothers Expo, suggests 5 ways to make every moment count as a working mother.

1) Prioritise.  
What is most important to you? Do more of that and less of everything else...

2) Clear your diary. 
Just say no. Be on time for the kids. (It definitely goes with priorities and making your children the number 1 priority!)

3) Pause to breathe. 
Do the things that makes you happy, like reading, long baths or time-outs! Whatever!

4) Sing. 
The advice is to sing, even though you are not very good at it! My Little Miss does not appreciate my singing at all, and usually asks me to stop. But maybe it will work for you? ;-)

5) Sign up for the Working Mothers Expo VIP Waiting List and book your diaries for the  Working Mothers Expo, brought to you in partnership with MiWay Life, bringing together everything a working mother needs under one roof at the Sandton Convention Centre.


How do you make the moments count as a working mother?





Read more on this article: 5 Ways to make every moment count as a working mother

The Working Mothers Expo, brought to you in partnership with MiWay Life, brings together everything a working mother needs under one roof on 4-6 November at the Sandton Convention Centre.  Take a step back from your hectic schedule, make some time to reflect, hear an inspiring speaker, indulge in some retail therapy and connect with other working mothers. We would like to create some dedicated time in your schedule that is all about you.

3 Ways to Create Me Time in Your Day - Guest post

The ultimate Holy Grail for mothers. Just a bit of me time!
Coffee in a coffee shop usually does the trick for me, but I am always eager to learn about more ways...

Guest post by Janice Windt, MD of the Working Mothers Expo:

Somewhere in the far reaches of my memory I can recall the concept of Me time: A moment that involved me, a book and a cup of chamomile tea on the two-seater couch that just fitted in my tiny first apartment...  A breeze would gently blow the sweet sound of children’s voices in through the open window.  I would lie peacefully, my knees over the couch armrest, dreaming of the day when I would be married with children of my own…

Today, Me time is the three minutes I get on the loo to check Facebook before one of my sons bursts through the door to see what I am up to.  It’s my drive to work – a luxury many stay-at-home mums would give anything to have – even once a week.  Me time is the thirty minutes I get here and there when I just leave everything – dishes, dirty clothes, toys strewn into every nook and cranny.  Sometimes I just look at it all and say “no, not right now” and I escape to my writing.  Sometimes, me time is a coffee, uninterrupted, during work hours.  That is a dream too – I know that and I appreciate every creamy sip.

So, what can you do, amidst the chaos that is your schedule, to create more Me time in your day? We have some suggestions for you below but we would really love to hear yours in the comments… because the truth is that we are all in this together:

Grade 1 - we did the right thing!

As parents we are always second-guessing ourselves, and hoping we make the right decisions for our children.

But we also know our children, and know them at their best!

I am so glad we decided to send Little Miss to Grade 1 this year. The school readiness results last year indicated that she was not emotionally ready, and we were sent for occupational therapy as well as visual therapy. We have completed a series of visits to the OT as well as visual therapy. Both therapists have given her the "go-ahead" for Grade 1. The last of the visual therapy was on Saturday and Little Miss drew a heart picture to give to Penny (see picture above). I am amazed at how well she can now control her eyes. She can bring pictures together by only moving her eyes around. (I don't think I can do it, and I am too afraid to even try...)

The first week of school has also been a bit hectic with Little Miss being very tired at the end of the day, and clingy to start with! She also got quite confused with the extra-murals, and we are still searching for lost clothes that gets lost on an almost daily basis.

But, by the third week she started very good with Little Miss saying goodbye at the gate. There are less "Not a lekker day"-remarks that we have to hear at the end of each day! We are still walking her to the class, but she is happy to go off and play. Especially if she has a coin or two to spend at the Tuck Shop... (Which we try not to give in to, but yesterday I was weak again when I had to drop her off!...parenting fail much!)

She has been loving her teacher and her class. We decided not to say anything to her teacher about the extra OT and visual therapy, and to see how it goes! There has not been any complaint or negative feedback from school. Her school work also looks very good when it gets sent home!

She loves learning to read, and she is trying to spell all words she comes across. Out of her own free will, and without any push from us! (She is actually irritating us with trying to spell everything, and of course asking us to help her with it! Sorry, Little Miss! I will try harder at the end of my working day when asked to spell something/e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g for you!!)

She is also doing very well with the maths, and that we can definitely link back to her doing CMaths since last year! It has given her the edge that I have been hoping for! She is not a CMaths whizz-kid, but she has a better grasp of maths than her peer group. That's all we want!

There is a large amount of homework. It keeps her busy for at least an hour to two hours each day which I think is a bit much! But the after-care helps in doing most of it with the children, and we only have to quickly retrace some of it in the evenings. Luckily it is Hubby and I who are there to follow though! We can focus on her alone, which makes it easier on all of us!

I was talking to another mom the other day about her daughter that she kept back for another year, and I realised that I could say that we also did the right thing! Just as her daughter is still not ready for the huge leap into Grade 1, our daughter are now enjoying her Grade 1 year to the max!!

"Phew!"

Little Hoot of the day: You have a boring job

This conversation happened in the car yesterday afternoon.

Little Missy told me she was very bored at my work two weeks back when the schools were closed.
She had to keep herself busy for a full working day while I was at the office. She was actually very good. The best she's ever been, and I had to buy her the promised chocolate when we left in the afternoon.

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"Why don't you get another job?"

Jobs are not that easy to get and change. Both your dad and I have to work to pay for everything.
I also like my job.

"Dad is not working. You have to go to an office to work."

Your dad's office is at home.

"Your job is boring. I don't want to go there any more!"

You had asked to come with me to my work a long time ago, and I promised that I would take you with. You also enjoyed the box building and the picture making and putting it on my walls...?

"No, it is very boring!"

---------

The Little Hoots app finally launched in beta over the weekend, and I love playing around with it.
It is also free.
It can be downloaded here: LittleHoots on the iTunes store.


Related post:

An app that I would like right now: Little Hoots

So glad we took the time to watch the netball

Little Missy took part in her first tournament of netball at school yesterday.

We decided at the last minute to take the afternoon off to go and watch. I get only one afternoon a month, so I have to really plan around it! (The joys of being a working mother!)

She was extremely excited when she saw us coming to watch her.

They did not keep scores for the under six players, and it seems that the rules of the game are still not very clear to all of them.
But they had fun! Until some did not want to play any more, or they got hungry (our Little Missy!).

How you look after your goal post!

Pose

Team White walking in a line

Team White with their coaches for the day

I decided afterwards that I have to put in more effort to watch her sports! I will miss out on many highlights if I don't!

How do you plan around watching the sports when you are a working mother?

Traffic and floods - I wish there was an Auntie Traffic

My view each morning and night

I phoned my dear husband last night in traffic, after we had been moving two metres every two minutes, and there was no end in sight... He wanted to make a few suggestions of how to get out of there! But it was impossible! I was stuck in four lanes - which became two lanes, which became one lane - going very slowly towards a flooded area in the road on Barry Hertzog.

I said I was just complaining!
I just wanted to tell someone!

I wish there was an Auntie Traffic that I could direct my complaints to? @EWNTraffic and @PigSpotter and @TrafficSA just doesn't do it for you! The best is when they retweet one of our tweets, but most of the times it is the same as swearing through closed windows at the taxis coming past in the wrong lane and sneaking back in front of you! (Which happens every day in any case! Just more so when there are rains and floods and back-up traffic on the road.)

The flooded area on Barry Hertzog

We went through this water last night, and my car gave a little flicker, but it made it to the other side.
High five!
Never again! (If I can help it!)


Thanks for listening! I needed to get a complaint in somewhere!


How is your traffic each day?

Keep Calm and MOOC on

I wanted to start studying again, but it did not pan out this year.

I still want to do that longitudinal study and complete my Masters that I had to give up when we had the little one! (I am still putting it out there, Universe!)

But in the meantime I have learnt about Massive Open Online Courses (MOOC) which are free, and this is what has been keeping me busy for the past three weeks. I have one and a half weeks to go with this class.

The best part! The course is free!

I am doing the New Librarianship Master Class of the Syracuse University.

It has been keeping me very busy in the evenings...

 

It is more theory and more content than I had anticipated! (Help!)

But it is mind-blowing all at the same time!

I love it that it is possible to further one's own professional development at one's own pace, and that it is for free.

Now there is no more excuses!

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Working Mother's Monday Blues

Miss the Little Miss today...
We had a whole weekend with her, and I always MISS her during the week!

We went to Skoobs, the ultimate bookish pleasure, at Montecasino yesterday. Dad spent some time with her in the children's book section.
We then all sat down with our books, and she paged through hers as well. Fetching new ones when she was finished with one...
She is a big girl already!

And today I miss her!

Luckily I have these questions to keep me occupied :-)
"Must we dance in the train?" (1-5-2013)
"Why do women have handbags and men don't? (1-5-2013)

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Chickens and cupcakes

Looking forward to Easter

Today is Sweetie Day at school, with the Little Missy's class selling sweets and cupcakes, generating a bit of income for the class.

As usual I was not cheering from the sides, eager to start baking those cakes...  

That's why I had to drive to three different shops last night to find the right cupcakes, and that would not cost me the last of  my month's food budget. 

I got a "bright" idea to put Easter eggs on top of the cupcakes and call it Easter cupcakes. 

(In my world I am proud of my achievement! Working Mom win!!) 

AND my little one thinks it is great! She helped with putting sprinkles on, and handing me the chocolate eggs. She also scored one to eat!!

Cupcakes with chocolate eggs on top

Cupcake

Dad had to go and buy beer to get us the box
(He did not have any objections ;-) )

The previous week they had chickens hatching at school. They watched the eggs the whole week, and on Thursday the chickens began to appear. Very sweet!

Marked eggs and some chickens in a hatching box

Look Mom!

Luckily the chickens were enclosed

The children all got a turn on Friday to hold a chicken! Very sweet!

Photo by Teacher Marlene

Happy Friday!

Looking back, and looking ahead to 2013

2012 was a great year! It was the year of being sorted!

Sort of... ;-) (Life happens!!)

There was a lot of new beginnings...

We started out with a student going off to Varsity, and then having to deal with initiation stuff which seemed a lot orientation! I felt like I had failed my child, especially since it lasted for the whole year! Next year is definitely going to be much better for her with no more of these practices, which I totally abhor!

The toddler also started at a new pre-primary school, and we know we have made the right choice of moving her! She is extremely happy where she is, and can't wait for a new year with a new teacher in the Dinosaurs' class.

The toddler is four now, and sometimes she is still the toddler, and sometimes we see some of the little girl she is becoming!

I made a few new year's resolutions this year, and some were met. I lost a few kilograms, but next year I have to make serious plans for dieting and exercising. We are also now card carrying members of Virgin Active, and next year you will be seeing more of us there! (Yeees! Of course!)

Hubby went to Mauritius which left me a bit lot envious, but we got to spend some time at the coast as well. The toddler loved the sea this time around!

We definitely need to go on more holidays to recharge and to enjoy our beautiful country!
I did not get to go to Cape Town for a weekend, so it's on my vision board for next year again!
We have an upcoming holiday in Mpumalanga, and we can't wait!

I have studies as a major goal listed for 2013, and maybe this year I can complete my Masters with a longitudal study! (Putting it out there, Universe!!)

I loved loved my iPad this year, and a whole new world opened up to me because of the possibilities with regards the education value of iPads for children. (I am still thinking of taking it up at my child's school - there are ways to put it in every child's hand!)

It has not been a year of any major upheavals or problems in our lives! Yes, we are lucky!
Boring is sooooo good!

We had a near death-defying accident on the highway two weeks ago, and we got away with only a bumper that needs repairs! Yes, we are lucky!

Careerwise it seems we both will have to look into some changes... You know when you have reached the tipping point! When you need new challenges...
2013 seems like a good year for changes in our careers!

I am still working on my goals and visions for 2013.
I believe that it helps in steering us in a definite direction!

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My best wishes for 2013! I hope all your dreams/goals come true!

What goals have you formulated for 2013?

Child at work - send out the Mayday!

I am reeling after a morning spent with the Toddler in my office.

Hurricane Mieka did a good job of re-organizing my whole office.

I miss her, but not while I am trying to get some work done!
I am very impressed that I can show something for my day! (*pat on own shoulder*)

Luckily her dad came to fetch her at lunch-time!

How do working mothers do it?
I had done a previous post on taking the Toddler to work, but those tips lasted only for the first hour!

I think I need to go and search for tips of what to do with them at the office.
It should be a long list, because each activity lasts for only a few minutes.

Any tips for me?


Related posts: 

Wordless Wednesday #106 - Rough last day at the office!

Taking the Toddler to work

Working mothers contemplating new studies

As I am contemplating to start studying again next year, this guest post had some valuable points to consider, especially when you are a working mother.

 

Moms are always looking to go back to school. [Or some of us...]

However, most of us also have either part-time or full-time jobs that they need to keep in order to support their growing families.

For what qualities should these dedicated and motivated parents search when looking for the best online degree programs?

Residency Requirements

While the term "online program" implies that all of the studies will take place over the computer, this is not always the case. Some schools will allow students to complete the majority of the program online, but they will need to attend the physical campus for a certain number of credits, specific programs or maybe even an entire semester. Parents must look into this component before enrolling. If they have a full-time job, they likely won't be able to take off for three months to go study on campus.

Class Meeting Requirements

When parents are working full-time and taking care of a household, it's best to look for programs that are as liberal and casual as possible in terms of strict time confines. Indeed, parents must complete their assignments by the date and time that they are due. However, they should look for programs that do not have online chat session meetings. For example, some classes might require that the entire group meet and chat every Monday and Wednesday night at 7. When the kids have gymnastics at 6:30 on Mondays and dance at 7:15 on Wednesdays, this arrangement does not work so well. A strict class schedule could be better for parents with older children.

Length of Study

It's unlikely that parents have the time to enroll in a program that could take them five to six years to complete, especially when they don't know what their children's schedules will be like that far down the road. The best degrees are usually the ones that take two to three years at most as that is generally in the foreseeable future for many families. Parents have somewhat of an idea of what their children's school and activities schedules will be like during that time frame.

A Beloved Discipline

Of course, one of the most important components of picking the best online degree program is for mothers to choose a path that they love. They're likely going back to school because they aren't happy with their current positions or because they want to advance themselves in their current field. Therefore, the best programs are the ones that will help parents truly accomplish their goals and to fulfill the dreams that they have had for themselves since they were children and teenagers. Furthermore, don't forget that school is stressful, and it's a lot easier to get through the day-to-day grind if you actually enjoy what you're learning about!!

The "best" online degrees are going to vary from person to person. A situation that works for one family may very well not work for another as all family dynamics are different. An MBA might be great for most people, but there will always be exceptions to the rule. Therefore, it's important for working parents to conduct research on a variety of different programs to find the one that is best suited for themselves, their families and their financial situation.


Kandi Trier writes about education, family and more. Her proudest piece is on the Top 20 Value Online MBA Programs.

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The sky is falling on our heads! Please!

We've got a bit of a cold spell going on in South Africa.

There's reports of some sort of rain ice-rain sleet snow falling in some part, and we are all making updates about the weather!

It is big excitement here!

Snow is not something that we see here on a daily basis. 

Not even on a yearly basis...

We ran out from our office when somebody told us that she is seeing something here in Johannesburg, but except for a few wet drops on the paving, there was nothing to see and to report...

I am thinking of my children who is at university and at pre-primary school, presumably freezing... Hope not!

While I am warm and snug in my office cubicle! (*Guilty!*)

Have you seen the snow?
Where?

UPDATE:
Yes, we've got snow! (12:00 pm)

Working moms and volunteering at school

Working mothers can never compete with SAHMs when it comes to volunteering at school. It is just not always possible to to be there.

With hindsight I am really grateful to my parents who always pitched in at school when there was a call for help. Now I really understand the effort on their part!

I have said yes to a couple of volunteering efforts at school, and afterwards felt that I had to overcommit and overextend myself! (The things you do for your children...)
Such as The Fundraiser last year!

One thing I have taken away from all these. It is okay to sometimes say NO! Your children will understand.

I read this nice list over at National Nannies that seems to be a good way to get involved without feeling done in afterwards.


10 ways working moms can volunteer at school:

1. Coordinate class parties through e-mail.  
2. Cut out or prepare things at home.  
3. Send money to help with a project. (I vouch for this one!)
4. Make calls at night.  
5. Provide extra school supplies.  
6. Ask your nanny to stand in for you.  (If you are as lucky to have a nanny!)
7. Join the PTA or PTO at your child’s school.  
8. Chaperone a field trip.  
9. Help with set up for an evening event.  
10. Volunteer to work at the concession stand.  

(Read more over at National Nannies)

The best thing that I have learnt is to always try to make an effort, but if it is not possible, 

never to feel guilty about it!

I am working because I have to, and because I want to give my child a better life!

Wordless Wednesday #134 - Working with Mom