My Bipolar Friend

Depression always lurks nearby... If you do not have depression, you know somebody who have...

I had to live with it in a previous life: Depression - I feel sorry for the people living with the depressed

Even though I do not have the Big D (and never will), I sometimes get the downers, or go depro for a while. We all go there! What makes the difference, is that I can  talk myself out of it... But I get an inkling of how it must be to suffer from depression.

I have a bipolar friend, and it has become increasingly difficult to talk to her. I have been phoning her for months where she do not pick up the phone, or return my calls. When I finally get to speak to her, I can hear that she is reticent in exchanging any information about her well-being. I do not know if she is in a UP or DOWN phase, but usually the UP phase is noticable by lots of creative thinking, no sleeping and lots of over-the-top ideas! The DOWN phases I usually don't know about it, only after the fact...

I find it very frustrating, and I have given up to try and talk to her. But I will always be here when she wants to talk again...

I want to say to her:
- I value your friendship!
- I miss you!
- I am really interested in your well-being, and when I ask about how everyone is doing, I am really concerned about you!
- I miss having a conversation with you!

I will be here, waiting for that call...

Depression – I feel sorry for the people living with the depressed

When I hear or see that somebody is depressed, my sympathy lies with the people living with that person!  Because I was in a similar situation eons ago, in a previous life...

I by no means want to lessen the feelings or the validity of the depressed! I believe depression to be one of the most life-sucking diseases there is!

The fact is that the people surrounding that person cannot do much to ease the suffering of the person. They cannot lift him up. They cannot kick him into his senses! They cannot tell him to shake it off! They are totally helpless! It is a depressing situation to be in! For the people surrounding that person!

The depressed person goes into a vortex of black hopelessness. If you are not careful, you get sucked into it as well!

I remember feeling as hopeless as the depression! I was becoming depressed myself. I went to a psychologist to ask how to handle the situation. She suggested medication, but I felt that it did not address the problem, but the symptoms of the problem...

The only other option she gave me was to run on a treadmill to get rid of my anger. Anger - that was what my emotions turned into! Anger that could not be vented! Because poor little depressed person! He cannot deal with it! He cannot work because of it! He cannot be blamed! Because it is the Depression!

You can imagine my feelings about “Depression”! Insert a couple of expletives here!!

I remember running and running on that treadmill! Somehow it did not work! The depression and all of it symptoms stuck with us!

In the end I had to get rid of the “problem”.  I had to change “my” life! I could not change somebody else’s life! I had to get out of the situation! I had to save “me”!

That’s why I still feel much more sympathy towards the people impacted by the depressed person!


But I have the utmost of respect for the depressed person who works with his depression, and who wants to get better! The person who do not want to stay in the dark cauldrons of his mind, but who reach out for help!
It is one of the hardest things to do!  To work with self! I salute you!

(Photo: Montecasino Bird Gardens)