Heads up about the last year in school

Stuff to expect from your girl teen

• The boyfriend is more important than you!

• The friends are more important than you!

• Her life and time-table are more important than you. You are lucky when she ventures out of her room to come and talk to you. It really tells you that you have a relationship going when she comes to share some of her life with you.

• You will never find an open door.

• She loves to sleep! All the time! (Most probable position you will find her to be in behind the closed door.)

• She can’t wait for the year to pass for exciting times ahead next year at university! (She feels she’s in limbo right now)

• The matric dance (Prom) is the most important event happening in her life! Ever!

• The dress, (and heads-up!), the after-the-party party dress, are extremely important!

• The make-up and hair should be sorted before the day. (There should be trial runs before the time!)

• A cell phone is an attachment to her hand!

• Most come-back retort when asked why she did not do something: “I did not know I was supposed to do it!”

I am making the list tongue-in-cheek.

I really like my Teen and the person she is!

I love her optimism about life, and her excitement about her future! It is very infectious!

I love her I-am-going-to-change-the-world attitude!



You go, my Girl!

(Photo: Patrick Pretorius photography)

Grade 12 – the stress is getting to me!

The last year of school is a lot harder than I can remember... It definitely feels a lot more stressful going through it with The Teen than when I was in high school.

We did not worry about good grades as much as they do now. The grades are being submitted to the universities already! So much decisions and choices have to be made this year! And is it going to be the right ones?

Maybe because I know that in years later we question ourselves about our careers choices later one in life? The choice of higher learning institutions also seems to be a huge headache.  I knew where I wanted to go, and went! Now it is not as easy as that... We have to verify the standards of the different institutions as well!

Then there is the French tour that’s finally just around the corner... I am going to be just as relieved when The Teen finally steps on that plane. So many things to do yet before that happen...

And I feel sorry for The Teen who comes home and has to sit with tons of homework at night and weekends. The photo was taken with The Toddler also doing some “homework” with The Teen in her room on Saturday. She was there for at least an hour, which is quite a feat for our Toddler! Our hardworking Teen seems to have an impact on the Little One!

Mother is stressing big time!

What does it mean to be a Mother?

What does it mean to be a Mother?


Answer: Going to boring prize-giving ceremonies.

Maxabella wrote such a beautiful post about the things she remembers about her own mother, and how she wants to be remembered by her children. It made me think about my mother and one thing that we could always count on was our parents attending our school events. Each and every event for each of us four!

Now I know what a big accomplishment that is! (Thanks Mom and Dad!) It says that you really really cared about us!

I was sitting last night at my daughter’s yearly certificate ceremony. It is by far the most boring event we have to go to as parents! It’s a very close second to Stork Parties! Having to sit through all 500 kids walking over the stage and getting their names and achievements all read one by one… Only to get excited about the three seconds that your child gets her moment-of-glory!

The Teen knows how I feel about it, but up until the baby I attended all of her events as well. The previous two years we left early because we had an excuse (2 month-old baby), and last year we did not attend at all! (The teen gave us off)  (Bad Mother)

This year its The Teen’s last year in High School, and she did really very well the previous year. She is in the top twenty of her grade, the first time in high school. We are so very proud of her! She worked for it! We made an effort to attend the function. The school is running the whole operation like a slick well-oiled machine, and we were out of there within an hour and a half. Not bad!

If she only remembers us sitting in the audience, my job of Mother has been done well! (Wink smile)

(Photo by Grandfather James on Sunday)

The Teen is starting her last year in school - Grade 12

The Teen with a friend in class - send via her cell

The Teen is in Grade 12! Matric! How did that happen? How did the years pass so quickly? I took her to Grade 1 just the other day! I can still remember her excitement of going to school... And the new clothes and suitcase...

There was some of the same excitement today... She is wearing her new red jersey today which is an indication that they are the senior people this year in school. The Matriculant!

She is very excited, but also a bit nervous about what she thinks is going to be a very difficult year! Read her post about The year has gone swoooosh! last year.

May you have a very exciting, wonderful, and richly fulfilling year at school this year, my Girl! May you get all the marks that you deserve for your hard work! I know you are going to do well! Because you plan to work hard as well! (And you have shown that previous years! I don't even have to worry.)

I love you!
Mom

Not making the cut

Ballito Bay June 2010

I asked my teen to write her own account of the recent disappointment in her life. This is her own version.

Arnia:
I tried to prepare myself for that day. I said that I would like to focus on my schoolwork next year and not to have any big responsibilities, but yet when they called out the names of the new SRC (Student Representative Council) and my name wasn’t one of them, it felt as if my world came crashing down all around me.



My friends and I sat together when the principal called out the names. One for one my friends’ and bf’s names got called out, except mine.


I have always been involved in activities at school and I am a good student. I am an extrovert and love going out with friends.


The day after the SRC was announced, me and two other girls got called into the personnel office and said that they really hoped that we would be part of the SRC. They said that they thought we were a ‘done deal’ of getting into the SRC. They told me I was only two votes short. It really helped with the pain (sarcastic snort). What made it worse was that kids asked me why I wasn’t at the SRC meeting?


The SRC is only chosen by the Grade 11’s; teachers have no say in the matter. It also upset me to see girls on the SRC who uses drugs and drinks every weekend.


I am over the pain, because I know I can still make a difference in the school without that badge. I can also focus on my schoolwork next year.


On the bright side I still get to go to the SRC ball with my boyfriend!

Related post:
Handling disappointments

Stressful teen years

I feel very sorry for teenagers nowadays. Their lives are so busy. With studies, and sport, and exams! I think they have more stress in their lives than we used to have.

Arnia comes home from her hockey, and then she has to finish her homework and study as well. She even has to decide which task is most important (counts the most), and make a choice what to do and what not. It does feel as if they get more on their plates than they can handle sometimes... Or, maybe it is good for them? It teaches them to focus their energies. (I hope so!)

I was very proud of her last week when she typed out CV’s with introduction letters. She handed the CV’s to managers at seven shops in the nearby mall. She is looking for a part-time job at weekends and school holidays to start saving for the French tour next year. She got six “maybe” answers and the promise that they will phone her this week. Thumbs crossed!

Sometimes all that is needed is to go and ask...

The teen and preparations for the year ahead (for her life)

She was named Arnia Kiara. She has been calling herself Kiara since she started with High School. (They never like the first names they were given. Sigh – I still think Arnia is a name that is special!)
It is crazy that she has grown up so quickly. I have firsthand experience! (Yes, I am the older mom grrrr...!) It has made me realise to savour the toddler and her developmental stages even more. But I do remember that a friend of mine, Yvonne (fellow-blogger) whose daughter is five days older than Arnia, and me used to say that we did not want the two girls to grow older than they were at any of their growing up phases. But it went by in lightning speed, even if we tried to put on the brakes. Arnia was a cute cutie, and now she is a beautiful lady. ALREADY!
She is busy starting to spread her wings; with talk of university and of her own life. It feels too soon, but I know we must start preparing ourselves.
The following needs to be done:
- Get a passport for the French tour in 2011;
- Get a learner’s license this year;
- Get a driver’s license;
- Gather info about studies, and different higher educational institutions;
- Talk to people involved in careers she is interested in: communication, journalism, diplomats, public relations...
- Get her a part-time job (she has already dished out her own ad for child-minding and house-sitting in our complex)

I enjoy her so much, and hope that she would be able to make the most of her life. The ultimate which every parents could wish for – to be happy with what you are doing with your life!

(Photo: the teen posing with hockey clothes – she has been exercising this year with great conviction – she is part of the B-Team at the school)